As you know by now, the main focus of my website Fit to the Finish (www.fittothefinish.com) and this blog is to share my thoughts and experiences with weight loss. As an obese woman for over eight years, I experienced many different emotions and lived through numerous embarrassing situations. Fortunately, there were many more times of great joy in my life than great sadness. There have been some articles written that encourage people to just be satisfied with their weight, no matter what it is. That is really hard to do.
Personally, I dieted for years. Like many of you, I was constantly “dieting.” You may not have believed I was dieting if you watched me eat, but in my mind I was always cutting back and always trying to lose weight. Of course those attempts at losing weight were never successful, either short or long term. As the years marched by, I became more and more convinced that it was impossible for me to lose weight. I was just destined to be overweight. I was happy to be fat.
Not true. I wasn’t destined to be overweight, and I definitely wasn’t happy being fat. Where are you today? Are you at the point where you are trying to convince yourself that it’s okay to be overweight? I’m not saying that you should be basing your happiness on your weight. But imagine that you could look at your life like a pie chart. If you pull out the weight component, are you satisfied with that part of your life? If I think back on the time that I struggled so mightly with my weight, I realize that I was happy in most areas of my life, but underlying all the good that was happening, my weight problem was always holding me back.
Even so, after years of dieting and never exercising, I tried to give up. I quit joining Weight Watchers, stopped checking weight loss books out of the library, skipped the “I lost 100 pounds” articles in magazines, and continued to eat like there was no tomorrow. Although I publicly espoused the mantra, “big is beautiful,” I didn’t really believe it. I still hated shopping in the Plus Sized department. I abhorred any type of physical movement. I avoided social situations that made me uncomfortable. And most importantly, I still wasn’t satisfied with my appearance, my energy level or my weight.
I had given up on the outside, but somewhere inside of myself I couldn’t give up completely. In speaking with numerous men and women who have struggled with their weight, they shared with me how they never privately gave up trying to lose weight and improve their health. Where are you today? Have you publicly surrendered to satisfaction with your weight, but still have an internal struggle raging? Are you like I was, and trying to convince yourself that you are happy at your current weight and satisfied with your appearance? If so, believe me when I say to you, I understand.
After many years of dieting, and a few years of “giving up,” I finally reached the point where I was ready to try again. After Mark’s birth, I realized that I was heading up the slope and there wasn’t any end in sight. My weight problem wasn’t going to go magically away, and I wasn’t going to wake up one morning 10 sizes smaller. So I finally put all the knowledge I already had into a plan that worked for me. I began eating smaller portions – a lot smaller, exercising consistently, and eating foods that contained less than 30% of their calories from fat. I quickly saw results. No one else could see the results, but I knew it was working. And as you know, over the course of a year or so, I lost a substantial amount of weight.
I encourage you to not quit. You may be at the point in your life where I was, and feel like the effort and emotional trauma of unsuccessful dieting just isn’t worth it, but that’s where you may be wrong. Unsuccessful dieting isn’t fun, but unless you try again, how will you ever know if you could have been successful that last time? If you are unhappy with your weight, health and appearance, try to get healthy again. I’m so glad I tried one more time! Diane
