I really should have been a lawyer, because for every argument you have to prove your point, I have ten more that I’ll try and use to prove you wrong. Or at least I think I’m proving you wrong! I sometimes drive myself and my family crazy!
As I gained weight and gained weight, I tried so many different diet plans it was almost laughable. And for every diet I quit, I had an excuse as to why that particular diet didn’t work for me. Here’s my top 10 excuses I used to quit a diet.
- I didn’t like it
- It was too hard
- I didn’t want to count things
- I was too fat to do the exercise
- I don’t like certain foods on the program
- Too expensive
- Probably it was just a scam
- Too time consuming
- I didn’t want to be weighed by a stranger
- Felt guilty about every piece of food I put in my mouth
Looking at that list now, twelve years into maintenance, I can laugh at myself. Who was I kidding? The problem wasn’t the particular plan I was trying – the problem was me. Every excuse in the world wouldn’t make up for my lack of commitment, follow through, and readiness. With every diet I tried and failed, my excuse list grew. I’d vainly try and explain to John and my friends why I had once again stopped going to Weight Watchers, quit cutting back on fattening foods, or stopped counting calories. Sometimes the more I explained the worse the excuses sounded. Finally, I stopped explaining and started eating chocolate. I reasoned that John would assume I had quit my newest diet when he saw me eating chocolate chips for breakfast, so there really wasn’t any reason to explain. And my friends? Well, hopefully they wouldn’t ask.
What reasons have you given for failing to follow through on a diet that you’ve started? Are there any valid reasons to quit before you’ve reached your goal weight? Of course there are, and I’ll share my thoughts on that another day, but for now, let’s think about why we quit dieting.
When I looked back at the quick “Top 10″ list I wrote, I realized there was a common denominator. The common denominator was me. I was my own best excuse for stopping a diet plan. “I” didn’t like the way things were going, so “I” quit. It all came back to me, and all the excuses in the world couldn’t hide that.
It’s still hard for me to look at that list of excuses because I realize, even today, that I have to take full responsibility for my weight gain. That’s still hard for me to do. But moving past the sadness, and accepting the responsibility was important for me. Once I did that, I really started to sense a change in myself. Only I could remove the excuses I had used in the past for quitting a plan. Only I could get out my own way.
This wasn’t easy to do, because by throwing those excuses out the window what was I left with? Myself. Just me and my mirror. Looking back at my own reflection was not only the person who made up false excuses, but also the person who could put those excuses behind her and succeed.
As you go about your day today, I’d encourage you to think about what excuses you have used to either quit your plan, or veer significantly from your plan. Look in the mirror and convince yourself that the best reason to STAY on your path is looking right back at you. Diane
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oooh. yes.
) I didnt.
you nailed it with the COMMON DENOMINATOR huh?
for me it was always excuse number 11: I WASNT READY.
I didnt care ENOUGH. I was farfar happier with the pain I KNEW rather than risking the pain (joy? whoda thunk it?
MizFit´s last blog ..Juggle your way to fitness.
Oh yes. 6 and 8 were favorites of mine. Or, how about “I just want to be able to eat like everyone else?” or “I don’t smoke or drink or do drugs. Food is MY vice.” or “It’s too hard with little kids around.” Or, the one that I used MOST often, “My husband thinks I’m hot just the way I am.”
Then his best friend died last hear of heart disease at 31. Now we’re both 20 pounds lighter and exercising. If there is a gift in what is tragic, our friend gave us a big one.
Sue´s last blog ..I hate to say I told you so . . .
are you on Dr Oz today??? I saw a note about what was on his show and it was someone with 7 kids who had lost 150lbs. I did a double take. How many of them – with your exact numbers could there BE?
vickie´s last blog ..I understand that it is a percentages thing – but it is still a very weird feeling
Oh, I wish it was me! That would be so much fun. That is strange that it’s a woman who has lost the same amount of weight I did AND has seven kids. I wonder if she lost her weight before or after the pregnancies?
please add this to your list of things to write about – keeping secrets and why the secrets have to come out/stop in order to get to a place where one can lose weight, maintain losses and be happy (with themself).
It can be the number on the scale, the secret stash of food (which you have written about), or the daily habits. and I think that it can also be the $$$/debt on a credit card, the condition of the clutter in our house, how we spend our time, and lots of other things that we MAKE into secrets.
vickie´s last blog ..I understand that it is a percentages thing – but it is still a very weird feeling
I suppose it boils down to this -
looking for excuses, find excuses.
looking for answers, find answers.
vickie´s last blog ..I understand that it is a percentages thing – but it is still a very weird feeling
I’m missing your blogs so much…..had to come around today and visit as your blogs give me so much food for thought.
I see what your saying in my own life and in people who are still trying to lose their weight…all this that I read here, its them, I wish they would come and read this and see themselves here in your entry.
I admire you for the 12 years of maintaining and I hope to reach to that number myself without gaining the 20kgs I lose…..You are such an inspiration as I know from past how easy it is to lose the weight, but keeping it off is the hardest part.
Thanks for your fantastic entries.
Marcelle´s last blog ..Visiting Lucky At Her New Home
Great post and great thoughts, as always.
South Beach Steve´s last blog ..Kicking it Off With a Bang!
I suppose my problem in the past was committment – not really ready to take on the huge problem I’d created. I’ve lost this weight before, so I think I’m kinda good at losing weight, but keeping it off is a challenge for me. I’m trying to make changes in habits this go round that will make it easier to keep the weight off this time.
Amy H.´s last blog ..Polenta with Fresh Tomato Sauce
Yes, Diane, we can be our own worst enemy. Always an excuse & being so unhappy, it becomes such a catch 22 because you feel bad & then give in..
I think alot of people have this problem: Lack of patience. People want the weight loss right now & it just does not happen that way. It took time to put that weight on and it will definitely take MORE time to take it off. Weight goes on a lot easier than it comes off & people have to learn that it takes time & there is no magic pill. Eat better foods, eat less if you are eating too much & get moving. Consistency & patience are key! Also, don’t lie & fool yourself. You have to be honest with yourself & accountable as well.
Excuses are a way of avoiding change. If we make excuses, then we don’t have to change. While changes can be scary, they can be good. It is through change we can better ourselves. No matter how big or small our goals may be we will only achieve them if we work to change our habits and strive to reach our goals…
RickyRae´s last blog ..T-Rex Syndrome
Great thoughts. It is interesting to think of how many excuses I’ve made. Honestly, most of the time, I don’t make a conscious decision to go off my plan – I just veer off gradually. My most common excuses are too expensive, too time consuming or just thought and energy consuming, too selfish or self-focused, and, “I should be able to eat the same things my skinny friends do.”
Laura Jane´s last blog ..Monday
I used most of those, or some form of them anyway. Except, oddly enough, #3 – Counting. I didn’t seek it out, but it wasn’t ever an excuse either. I’m a list maker and progress tracker by nature, but it didn’t occur to me to use those to my advantage.
In the end, it is ALL about us, our commitment and our consistency.
Cammy@TippyToeDiet´s last blog ..Makeover Monday: Fear-fightin’ Tool Kit
My favorite excuse is that I just don’t have time to work on it all. It seems hard to make the food, find time to workout and everything else.
11. I’m just going to gain it back anyway.
12. There’s no way I do this forever, so why bother.
13. I just wasn’t meant to be thin.
14. The timing isn’t good because of X coming up (vacation, special occassion)
Apparently, I’m good at rationalizing failure too! Of course, I always know deep down that I are just kidding yourself.
Janet´s last blog ..Day 120 – Weight Loss by the Numbers
I think my problem always was that I would embark on some strict diet/exercise program, and be so unhappy that I would give up. I’d figure that I was so unhappy anyway, and now I took away my yummy food and was torturing myself for something that took way too damn long, if it ever was going to happen at all. As Jody pointed out, patience and consistency were big problems for me, but before I could find them I had to find a lifestyle that incorporated some joy and pleasure into my diet/exercise, not just punishment
julie´s last blog ..Dr Kessler and I disagree
My biggest excuse was that when life got hectic (which is often) it was okay to exercise less and eat not so healthy… I had to realize that no matter what happens, I have to make myself a priority. Maybe I have to switch up my exercise routine a bit or take a few shortcuts when it comes to meals, but exercising and eating well has to be a part of every day.
In the last few weeks I have realized that taking care of myself actually helps me deal with a very difficult situation… Especially when things are difficult you need all the energy you can get, and there is no better way to get energy than by eating well and exercising…
Andrea@WellnessNotes´s last blog ..Burgers, French Fries & A Salad
My biggest problem was and sometimes is still, trying to be perfect, and consistency. And learning that just because i over ate at one meal doesn’t mean i throw in the towel.
suzanne´s last blog ..What a wonderful day
My top two excuses were 1) It took too long and 2) I’ll fail again. I finally figured out that as to #1, time is still going to pass whether I do something about my weight or not so I might as well be doing something about it and #2, looking to myself for accountability and encouragement (and the wonderful blogworld as well).
Gigi´s last blog ..Plateaus and Muffin-tops
How about the excuses I use to never even start my plan? I am the excuse queen.
debbie´s last blog ..Two Truths and a Lie – and maybe some drugs
When I am trying to follow a diet plan and I can’t seem to get it down right I always wonder if I’m making excuses or if it just doesn’t fit me, it’s hard to know. I know as far as exercise 90% of the time I have a million excuses.
Robin´s last blog ..The Dream of Anorexia
In his book, Illusions, Richard Bach says, “Argue your limitations and they are yours!” I tend to let life set my limitations. Unfortunately, it often does
Dr. J´s last blog ..The trouble with shopping lists, golf is good for you and taking the harm out of soft drinks
With me, it’s about staying on track with good eating decisions. I tend to veer when life gets busy or stressful. I don’t necessarily eat more because I’m busy or stressful, but I use it as an excuse to grab the wrong things. It’s like my taste buds attempt to refuse anything healthy during those times. I’m working on it!
Yum Yucky´s last blog ..The Greedy Family Gets Fit Together
You are always so spot on with your posts. Sometimes for me, I’m scared to fail…so its easier to give up and fail because I didn’t try hard enough than it is to admit that I tried my absolute hardest and that was STILL not good enough….
Lola´s last blog ..Bullet Style Update
Your post makes me want to sit and journal and find out why I never stuck to diet plans. To sum it up, I know that my only reason for never reaching my healthy weight or keeping off the weight I lost (I was within 30 pounds of my goal weight about 6 years ago) was myself. It was my lack of discipline or lack of desire to be disciplined that kept me bound and helped me to fall back into overeating and weight gain.
I also joke that my family, friends and husband just loved me the way I was, so they were to blame also. Not really, though at least I only battle self hatred and loathing and not criticism from family and friends.
All joking aside, diets were always making me limit foods in my life, and they were only ever a means to feeling better about how I looked or how I felt in clothes. I honestly can’t remember feeling like I do now about losing weigh- actually wanting to eat better and work at it. Dieting was always this struggle to do what I knew I should be doing, but I hardly ever wanted to be doing it. Make sense?
Hmm…going to have to think this one out again. Thanks for the thought provoking post!
Leah´s last blog ..Old Baking Habit
I think for me it was always a “no-care” attitude. I just stopped. I was never really a “fad-dieter.” Just tried to eat less, I guess. But it would get to the point, that I was just numb, and eat whatever I wanted, and didn’t exercise. I tried to block it out. But of course, the guilt, and bad feelings always creeped up, and that would be a constant cycle.
Lori´s last blog ..
My top excuse? I wanted ice cream!
Tony´s last blog ..Building Character
I don’t know. I do think there is some validity to some excuses. There are good reasons why certain diets aren’t for certain people. Of course, what that means is not that you should go back to eating unhealthfully, but rather that you should switch to something that will work, or just custom design your own plan.
You shouldn’t do a diet you don’t like. That doesn’t give you license to eat a whole sleeve of oreos, but it is important to find something that will work for you.
Hadley´s last blog ..Tuesday Weigh In
SO true. We’re our own biggest obstacles, especially when it comes to doing something we aren’t really ready to commit to.
I’ve realized that I have to *really* want this if it’s going to work. Because I’ll do what it takes without making excuses.
Sonya´s last blog ..Day 43: This gum had better do the trick
Oh yeah, I had all of those excuses (and more!), but the best part of your post is the last sentence…what an important thing to remember!
Shelley B´s last blog ..Eating Contentment
It isn’t so much an excuse that’s made me quit but impatience with results. I wanted to lose weight too fast each time I tried.
great post as usual, Diane!
Fitcetera´s last blog ..Spanx for your Support
My biggest excuses this time around was with exercise. Thank goodness I believe I have moved past it for the most part now. Great post as usual – you are such an inspiration!
Pam´s last blog ..Metamorphosis
Aren’t those just pitiful excuses…and I know since I was using some of them quite recently. (ahem, #3)
Amazing how easy it is to grab perspective when someone writes them down & you see them all lined up.
Thanks!
Lynn
Lynn @ Actual Scale´s last blog ..GAG / HYC Check In – Good News & Bad News
#5 — always my favourite excuse! Not anymore, though! Heck, I’m eating yogurt, zucchini…
GeorgiaMist´s last blog ..SAHALE SNACKS REVIEW and GIVEAWAY!
You’re so right about this. I stand in my own way all too often! No more excuses! Thanks for all of your though provoking posts!
Alissa´s last blog ..What a Headache!
I love this post! I have a history of unraveling and then making excuses. And it’s all ME.
Hanlie´s last blog ..Green Smoothie Do’s and Don’ts
My excuses consisted of the usual self-fulfilling prophecy (also known as “I am quitting because I know I can’t do this so why even try?” at the very first stumble) and a heady dose of anger and resentment (to the tune of “I’m not doing this because it’s not ‘fair’!”).
As wise folks have already stated, it basically boiled down to simply not being ready or willing to do whatever it took to change my life.
Dani @ WRW´s last blog ..GAG W2 WEIGH-IN & Weekly Review
Thank you for this post Diane. I have let my fat be an excuse for quite a bit in my life. No more excuses for me. Patience has always been a stumbling block for me, but I am really working on that and making my health be the goal as opposed to the number on the scale is helpful to me.
You are reminding me of one of the very first posts I ever wrote on my blog. I said that it’s not the diet’s fault you failed 50 times…it’s yours. Own it, feel the sting from it, and change it. Glad we’re on the same wavelength.
Tammy´s last blog ..The Battle Rages On…
This is so sweet and motivating! You’re right. We have to take responsibility.
Sagan´s last blog ..Day 15 of the Vegan Challenge
Great post. I liked the ending. The best reason to stick to it is YOU.
Thanks for your congrats on my success on my goal to lose 20 pounds in 10 weeks. Monday was a fun day!
Sunshine Mama´s last blog ..It’s Official…
at least for me, it isn’t the why I’m here that I struggle with… it’s the how do I change.
but I guess that’s why we blog…it’s a process
It’s HARD and we want everything quick and easy. It’s getting off our butt and moving when we don’t want to. It’s taking time to wash those fruits and veggies instead of just zipping by the drive through and getting those “value” meals.
And it is really hard to admit that our failure is solely on our own shoulders. We’d rather have someone or something else to blame.
And on another subject, such as your post with the photos of your family, they are all just beautiful! You are definitely blessed with a quiver full of lovely arrows.
MamaBearJune´s last blog ..A new week
Well most of my excuses are the same as in your top 10
Although I have to say that lately I’m not making much more excuses for screwing up on losing weight. I’m doing pretty well so I’ll enjoy it for as long as it last
Fran´s last blog ..A day in my life: Wednesday September 16th 2009