Comments on: Fallouts of Weight Loss

By: Lisa

Lisa — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 23:09:39 +0000

OOOPS I meant when we met I still had 20 pounds to lose. I've reached my goal. Sorry! .-= Lisa´s last blog ..The “I Forgot To Pack a Lunch” Lunch =-.

By: Lisa

Lisa — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 23:06:30 +0000

This post really hit home for me. I lost 110 pounds and in the process, I lost a few friends. I was no longer the “fat” friend for them. I was suddenly “competition” for attention. And a few other friends of mine, who were ALSO heavy, dumped me as well. I suppose they didn’t want to make the same life-altering changes I made. Maybe they were jealous. I don’t know. I could never get an answer from certain “friends” who dumped me. It makes me sad. It makes me really angry.

As for the comment that 50 percent of couples broke up after weight loss…I think my story is a little different. I lost about 80 pounds before I met my boyfriend Michael. I still have over 20 pounds to lose but he loved me anyway. I’ve since lost that weight and don’t see our relationship changing at all because of that.
.-= Lisa´s last blog ..The “I Forgot To Pack a Lunch” Lunch =-.

By: Ashley

Ashley — Mon, 05 Apr 2010 13:55:39 +0000

I can totally relate to this. My family tells me “not to get too thin!” (I am still 20 pounds overweight!) and my former best friend is a former because of the weight loss. I was the maid of honor in her wedding, and two months later she told me I was a disappoint, self-absorbed MOH. I don’t think that was the case … I think it was because I lost weight and she didn’t.
.-= Ashley´s last blog ..Our first Easter =-.

By: Fattie Fatterton

Fattie Fatterton — Sun, 04 Apr 2010 11:08:40 +0000

People are so afraid of change. We want people to improve themselves, but not if it’s going to affect US.

I am going through a similar thing with a friend of mine. I don’t want to go out and eat anymore for social gatherings, I want to walk or do something else. She doesn’t get it.
.-= Fattie Fatterton´s last blog ..Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape. =-.

By: Jenelle

Jenelle — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 18:44:01 +0000

I was in a long-term relationship when I finally reached my “goal weight”. He and I lived together for almost three years and he was a big part of the reason I gained so much weight in the first place. He was thin, but had issues with food much like mine (using it for comfort, overeating, etc.) As I started taking care of myself, he continued to eat horribly and loaf around watching television all day while I worked, worked out, and cooked healthy meals for myself. Part of me was with him because before I lost weight/gained confidence I didn’t think anyone could ever love me. He did, so he was good enough.

We parted ways about a month after I reached my goal weight. He was keeping me from living and truly loving and I was confident enough to go out and find someone to live life with. Even if it meant being alone for a while. I often joke that I lost 110 lbs in a year, and 160 lbs in one day (being the ex).

That’s really when I feel my life began again.
.-= Jenelle´s last blog ..Balancing Act =-.

By: julie

julie — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 15:47:34 +0000

I saw that in the comment, and wondered as well. It seemed a bit surprising, but not completely unbelievable. I had a much different reality 50 pounds ago. I’m single, and guys hardly looked at me, and I’ve actually had men tell me that they like to have sex with fat women, because they’re hungrier, more desperate. Sorry to be crude and rude, but I’ve had this said to my face. At this weight, guys at least look at me (though still don’t talk to me, though I don’t talk to them either), and I wouldn’t put up with bs like the above.

As for marriage, but I can see if one person makes a major lifestyle change, and the other won’t (if your husband still insists on pizza/fried chicken/lasagna every night for dinner, lots of beer and couch time), or if the marriage wasn’t that great anyway, it would be in trouble at this point.

Fair or not, thinner people have more options, choices, for dating. I don’t make the rules, I just notice them.
.-= julie´s last blog ..A Week away from the Gym =-.

By: Sean (Learn Fitness)

Sean (Learn Fitness) — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 11:00:30 +0000

I’m fortunite that my wife is on the same journey as me, with a delay for baby of course. But we plan food together, eat the same meals (she snacked differently), and workout together. So for us this journey is making us closer as a couple.

I will admit that early in our relationship (several years) when I was working out and she wasn’t it was stressful. To have hugely divergent life goals is hard to push past in young relationships or ones not on sound footing. The sooner both people understand the change the sooner they can both do a relationship life goal gut check.

Great post!
.-= Sean (Learn Fitness)´s last blog ..My First Healthy Giveaway =-.

By: zaababy

zaababy — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 14:24:25 +0000

My marriage was not good for over 20 years. During that time I gained 200 pounds and had eight children, my mother passed away, I was clinically depressed and didn’t know it. What held my marriage together was our children and our faith in God. Either one of us could have left and thought about it and talked about it but it never happened.
When I made the decision to lose weight, I genuinely thought I would just become thin and that everything else would stay the same. I had absolutely no idea that EVERYTHING would change. My life is 100% better. My marriage–complete turn around. All after just 90 pounds gone. I still have 110 to go to reach my goal. What will things be like then!
I was afraid that my marriage would fail because hey, it was crummy to start with! What a lovely surprise that God had in store for me.
Everyone in my life is completely supportive of me except for my best friend. My husband doesn’t secretly sabotage me. He is enjoying my new figure!
My friend, on the other hand, is overweight too but never as much as me. We walked daily together for months–and she never lost one pound! How horrible! I would share what was happening and she wouldn’t say ONE WORD. No response. I eventually stopped walking with her. I try to be careful of what I say about my weight loss cool things. Because I know that if the positions were reversed I would not say one word either. We are still friends. It has been eye opening for me because it really showed how horrible I have been to friends in the past who lost weight–including my own sister! I am ashamed to say I never one time acknowledged her incredible weight loss because I was so overweight myself and I felt bad enough as it was.
I never ever want my weight loss to hurt another person but no way no way on earth am I ever going to stop.
Good post today! err yesterday!
.-= zaababy´s last blog ..Day 327–Promised Pics–before and after, and my new bike courtesy of Jack Sh*t’s contest! Oh, and weigh day. =-.

By: emma

emma — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 13:28:21 +0000

I wouldn’t take that fellows word as evidence. Remember, 50% of marriages end in divorce anyway. He may be working with a particular sector of society which divorces more anyway. His comment really is not reflective of people who lose weight as a whole; it only reflects the sampling he works with. Maybe these people would split up regardless of weightloss. Maybe he works with people who enter into relationships lightly or have committment issues.

Just because he says it doesn’t make it universally true; far from it.

By: Miz

Miz — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 10:00:15 +0000

Im always late to the party but would talk a LOT with my clients about how we/they arent living in a vacuum and try to plan and envision how the weight loss would look for them (sure) but how it would impact those around them as well.