People ask me all the time what my kids thought about my weight loss and what they think of me now. They really are two separate questions.
When I lost 158 pounds over 12 years ago, my oldest child was only seven. And as such, she was a little bit aware that I was changing in front of her eyes, but not 100% aware. I’ve asked her what she remembers from that time period and she says she was a little worried I wouldn’t be the same mommy anymore. She also remembers me taking her on lots of long bike rides – something I had never done before that time.
I remember very vividly coming out of the bedroom dressed for church one morning and her saying, “Mommy – that’s the prettiest you have ever looked.” I had lost about 80 – 90 pounds by then and I felt so grateful that she noticed and could articulate the difference she saw in me.
My other two children were only 3 and 1 at the time, so they weren’t aware of the changes.
Now, with seven children, the youngest four being born after I lost all the weight, they have no concept of what I used to look like, or act like! When they see pictures like this one below they say, “Who is that lady?”
I laugh and tell them it is me in the picture and then silently thank God that I don’t look like that lady anymore.
My kids are very proud of my accomplishments, but more important than that, I think they take to heart the message of good health and healthy living that I try and model for them.
They were one of my primary motivators to get healthy. I didn’t want to die from a complication of obesity and leave them motherless when I could change my health status. I wanted to be around for a long time. And I wanted to be an active part of their life – not just sitting on the couch trying to muster up enough energy to get up and see something they had made in another room.
I look back and am so thankful that I lost the weight, got healthy, and have kept it off. My kids think it’s great to have a mom who blogs, speaks about weight loss, and interacts with them. I think it’s great to have kids who are fun, active, and full of life!
So there you have it – an answer to one of the many questions I get through email, etc.
Do you have someone in your life who thinks you are doing a great job? Or someone who motivates you to never give up? Diane
What a fantastic uplifting entry, its wonderful that your children see you that way.
Mine see me as competition so its not that good,my youngest gets upset if I fit into her jeans, or weigh less than her…but otherwise its all in the spirit of fun I’m sure.
I had to do this on my own,no one motivated me…
.-= Marcelle´s last blog ..Light At The End Of The Tunnel =-.
My son was young when I lost the 40 pounds he says he doesn’t remember much from that time in our life. My husband on the other hand always cheered me on with the atta girl he still does to this day! I’m lucky I have a great support system in life.
.-= Susan´s last blog ..Slip that leads to a Binge =-.
That was so cute–“Mommy – that’s the prettiest you have ever looked.” You must have teared up. I think it’s so great that you’re such a healthy role model for your kids. Not only that, but you can point to very specific reasons it’s important to be so healthy. How can they not listen to that?
Even more impressive? Seven kids. That’s a lot of work-I don’t know how you do it.
.-= Tracey @ I’m Not Superhuman´s last blog ..6 Bad Ideas =-.
“They were one of my primary motivators to get healthy. I didn’t want to die from a complication of obesity and leave them motherless when I could change my health status. I wanted to be around for a long time. And I wanted to be an active part of their life – not just sitting on the couch trying to muster up enough energy to get up and see something they had made in another room.”
I could say that word for word.
I, too, have seven kids, but the difference is that my older three are teenagers (18,16 & 15). The younger four are 7, 4, 3 & 1. My teenagers are very proud of me. My seven year old is also very proud of me and often tries to model my healthy choices and points out that she is doing so. I don’t think my 4, 3 and 1 year olds are very aware of any of it, other than that the 4 year old is pleased to see her mommy wearing more dresses. LOL!
.-= moonduster (Becky)´s last blog ..Skinny Dreaming Is On Facebook! =-.
What a happy post to read ! My motivators are my son, my husband, and this endless cheerleader that resides within me. She is part Pollyanna and part iron willed Dictator who has seen me through whole lot of life !
.-= Diane´s last blog ..Godzilla veggie laszgna =-.
I LOVED what your daughter said about you being pretty! You are such a great & shining example for your kids & all around you!
Me, my hubby & friends and family all support me! My hubby is my hero & lives thru all my craziness!
.-= Jody – Fit at 52´s last blog ..Mental Muscle – Jack Sh*t Talks FITness =-.
One big reason you lost weight was for your kids…. We all know how important it is to teach your kids how to be healthy, We don’t want to be overweight and see our kids follow that same path. My question to you Diane is, Was there Obesity in your family?? Did you learn unknowingly some bad habits from some family member??
I can totally understand why you still remember your daughter’s comment. Precious!
People ask my kids about my weight loss all the time – and the kids never know what to say – they just do not remember me ‘fat’.
My kids are now 20, 16, 12 and I lost my weight starting in 2005, so you would THINK they would remember me fat, but they do not.
when I put my picture collection together in march – all three kids watched it. And they were very surprised by many pictures. I think mom was just mom and they didn’t think about any of my body parts.
My son did comment that the college me and the current me seem to match/go together – but the me in the middle does not.
Helen, a weight loss blogger friend (that I have known since college) has said the same thing – the fat me – doesn’t even look like me.
So I can see how your little ones don’t even ‘know’ the old you in pics.
.-= vickie´s last blog ..No scales for me on the medical merry go round =-.
One day last year I was lying in bed in the evening, in the middle of a chocolate binge, and my oldest son walked in. I was very embarrassed and hid the chocolate and empty wrappers under the covers but he saw and asked me what I was doing! I realized at that moment what a horrible example I was showing!!! That was one of the many things that pushed me to change.
My husband and mother are my biggest cheerleaders. They are so supportive and understanding!
.-= Carla´s last blog ..Re-evaluating my goal weight =-.
As an in-shape, young adult, I had always been the, “be damned the others, I will motivate me to be the best I can be” type. But when I had a fall 15 years ago and gained 80 pounds, I also had a 5-year old daughter to consider. Even now that she is 20, she is foremost in my mind in each day of living fit.
.-= Emergefit´s last blog ..If we’re not listening, we won’t hear it… =-.
My mom is my constant support. Every time she would see me she said I looked better than before. She has a hard time looking at all the old pictures because they just don’t look like me.
My cousins are the funniest because they were 6 and 4 when I started losing the weight. They have no concept that the fat cousin they see in pictures is really me. They think I’ve always been able to chase them and ride the bike trail. They have no concept that I’ve ever been unhealthy.
.-= Cynthia (It All Changes)´s last blog ..Big Liar =-.
I still see a beautiful woman when I look at your picture, but I’m so glad you are healthy now
I’m proud that my daughter really paid attention to HOW I was loosing the weight. It was in a time in her life where she was really watching and learning from me (she was 13/14 at the time.)
I have never asked her, I think she is just thankful that I am taking care of myself now so I will be around many years down the road. And now she is taking care of herself too and really eats to help her body preform better. (Something I wish I would have started doing long ago)
also, my parents motivate me even though they have passed away from heart disease and cancer…I know they are wanting me to learn from there mistakes. If they could have known what they knew in their later years, they would have made the changes needed too
.-= Brenda´s last blog ..food star of the week~ Cinnamon =-.
That is just so cool, Diane!! My kids are 10,8 and 5… and this past Easter I walked out of my room.. and all their little mouths were hung open, ” Momma, you look beautiful!”
I just smiled from ear to ear… and they kept looking at me… so so precious!! It is just the best feeling in the world!!
I so love that you had 4 babies AFTER you lost your weight too! I can’t wait to try that myself… still don’t feel grounded or solid yet, and haven’t hit my goal weight. But hopefully soon soon!!
Big hugs.. Amy
.-= Amy S.´s last blog ..Day 2 ~ Sugar Shock Challenge =-.
It’s very nice that you have inspired your kids in more than one way and that they were your inspiration as well.
Although family and friends were concerned and are still sometimes concerned that I’m pushing myself too hard, they are proud of the job that I’ve done with getting healthier.
.-= ‘Drea´s last blog ..The Ear to Ear Standard =-.
How sweet of your daughter! My husband is my biggest supporter and cheerleader. That is very comforting to me.
My nieces don’t really remember me when I was heavy, but they saw some pictures of me at my heaviest, and the 5 year old said ‘I don’t want to hurt your feelings, Aunt Lori, but you were big’. LOL! It actually made me laugh when she said that, cause it’s true.
.-= Lori (Finding Radiance)´s last blog ..Chasing away the blues. =-.
Yes, I’m blessed to have a core of friends, my mom and my husband who never give up on me and encourage me to do my best.
The other day one of my 12yo’s says to me, “That shirt looks better on you now, Mom!” I was amazed and pleased that she noticed the shirt fitting better than when I purchased it over a year ago.
Plus, my other 12yo tells me, “Ooohh…. blackberries and strawberries! I could just eat those all the time!!” YES! My kids are enjoying the abundance of fruit I’m trying to keep around the house! Now just to get my 9yo son to enjoy them more..we’re getting there though.
.-= Leah´s last blog ..No Acceptance =-.
This post speaks volumes to me Diane. My children were the primary reason I started this process and continue to be huge motivating factors for me. I’ll never forget the day when my daughter didn’t want to tell me what had gotten her upset that day at school. Well, she did tell my husband and I got it out of him that someone at school had something some mean about me and it upset her. I was so embarrassed for her in that moment…now that I’ve lost 50 lbs I hear how proud of me she is and it just warms my heart. She’ll even post on my facebook or blog page that she’s proud. I can’t ask for anything more than that. I don’t ever want to be the laughing stalk of her friends again.
.-= josie´s last blog ..Run for Music 10K – WOW! =-.
What I got out of your post this morning is how wonderful it is that a person can change and just move on through life and really, genuinely put that “old you” behind you. It’s exciting! It means you CAN become a better you and you CAN leave that old person behind and the people who come to meet and know you won’t even know that old you. That’s such a delightful thought!
.-= Katie´s last blog ..Alternative Homes =-.
That is so awesome! What a beautiful testimony of “health” you are to your little ones!
Here’s my last post written today if you want to read it:
http://choose2livechoosehealth.blogspot.com/2010/04/vulnerability-in-losing-layers.html
You know, Diane, I think your kids are a treasure! I also know that even if you hadn’t lost any weight, they still would find you beautiful!
.-= Dr. J´s last blog ..Lab Notes: Premature Births Decline for Second Year in a Row; Liverpool Wants to Dump Word Obesity =-.
That is so inspirational, I bet the comment from your daughter just pushed you on! My boyfriend is like that, he is my biggest supporter
.-= Lauren @ Eater not a runner´s last blog ..headache-y =-.
I’ve been reading your blog for awhile now, but don’t think I’ve ever left a comment.
My best (guy) friend is my biggest supporter, coach, motivator and cheerleader. He is in fabulous shape and I know he’ll listen when I go on and on about exercise or eating and input advice when needed. When I feel lazy I’ll get a text from telling me to get up and move because I’ll regret it if I don’t.
I have 4 kids, but they have never said anything about my weight and have never had a huge gain or loss for people to notice, I guess, which is ok with me.
Congratulations on such an amazing transformation. I know it took lots of work to get there!
Thanks Diane for all your inspiration.
.-= LAF´s last blog ..Just putting it out there… =-.
Great post, I’m happy your kids are proud of you and you deserve that.
My hub is getting more and more supportive. At first he didn’t believe I would lose the weight when I started again last year because he has seen me struggling for the last 10 years. But now he’s more confident and sees I’m committed and gets more supportive.
My other big supporter is my best friend. She’s the best!
.-= Fran´s last blog ..A day in my life: Wednesday April 14th 2010 =-.
I don’t have any kids yet, but the thought of them has been a massive motivator for me. My husband, too, has been my biggest fan and one of the main reasons I wanted to lose the weight – I want to be around for a long, long time to enjoy my family!
.-= 266´s last blog ..What You See Is Not What You Get =-.
I’m quite determined that my little daughter will never know the obese me except in pictures.
.-= AndrewENZ´s last blog ..Best Running Song Ever? =-.
Dr. J is right… they will think that you are the greatest no matter what you do… or don’t do.
That being said, I want to say that my boys and my wife are the most precious things in my life. Sometimes they are the ONLY thing in my thoughts.
I know that I have to live healthy for them, so that they will have a dad and husband, but I also have to live this for ME!! I have to like myself enough to continue.
Thanks!!
WeighDownSouth.com
.-= Rob Dyess´s last blog ..SHE NAILED IT!!! =-.
What a sweetheart, that was a really great post today Diane. Having not only your family, but your children’s support is more than words could ever describe
I’ve never thought about what it would be like for a young child to see their parent lose a significant amount of weight. Very interesting! Glad that you got control of your weight and could make a healthy life for your children- something I want to do someday too!
.-= Alissa´s last blog ..Weigh In Day =-.
I want to be as healthy as possible for my little boy – since he’s an only child and will bear the responsibility of taking care of me one day. I don’t want to be a hindrance to him, ever. But also, one of the greatest gifts we can give our children is setting a good example. And hopefully by living healthfully and enjoying my work and lifestyle, he will happily follow in my footsteps.
.-= Melinda Neely´s last blog ..The Secret to Setting Goals (And Reaching Them) =-.
I’m glad that you’re happy with where you are in life right now. I’ve seen so many parents out riding their bikes with their kids lately- it makes me so GLAD that families are getting out there, exercising and having fun together!
.-= Sagan´s last blog ..The Living Healthy in the Real World Guide to Budgeting, Part Five: Fitting in Exercise =-.
I have to give my fiance all the credit in the world. We’ve only known each other seven months (engaged at five!) but he has supported me through many weight-loss related breakdowns. And he once said, “You know, I’m kind of stuck here, because I love you the way you are but I know how important it is to you. So that’s why I’m supporting you, not because I think you need to lose the rest of the weight.” He’s amazing.
.-= Ashley´s last blog ..Why KFC’s Double Down is not a big deal =-.
Don’t you just love kids! You are a fantastic exapmle to them on how to be healthy. That is what they see and what the will remember.
My kids are my biggest support. It is amazing how much they can motivate and inspire me. Love them!
Every now and then, my son makes a comment that makes me so happy. His comments were part of what got me started!
My daughter doesn’t recognize me in pictures from when her brother was little. She thinks it’s my aunt (we look a lot alike, but she’s 18 years older and 50 pounds heavier)
I have lots of people that help motivate me. My whole large family but especially sisters. one of them is always encouraging me and they are great examples. Also, for the first time in my life, I have received hand me down clothes from my sisters. Well, at least it is the first time since we were very young kids.
Staff at work are great too. Even though I have maintained my weight for the past 4 months, co-workers call me skinny mini and tell me how great I look. It is really appreciated.
Although many people motivate me to keep eating right. It all started with myself. I changed because I decided to change my eating habits. I wish I could motivate my husband, but I know it must come from him. Hopefully, some day before it is too late.