I was wondering how you answer the question: Who Are You?

What defines you and makes you unique?

Let’s make it fun and define ourselves in just a few words.

I’ll start:

I am a:

Wife

Mom

Independent

Thinker

Christian

That took me a few minutes to decide on just a few words to describe myself. Some of those adjectives and titles helped me on my weight loss journey. I wanted to be around for my husband and my children and they were primary motivators for me. I am independent, so I did my own thing to lose weight. I like to think about things, and I certainly thought a lot about weight loss. And my faith helped me get through really tough times.

Want to join in? Who are you?  Diane

Like many women, I avoided the mirror, especially when I was obese. I could look at myself without really seeing what I looked like. I could put on makeup, do my hair, brush my teeth, and not pay attention to what the mirror was showing me. That ability is both a blessing and a curse.

All throughout the years I struggled with my weight, I avoided having my picture taken.  I tried my best to be the one behind the camera, and I still do! The difference is that now, although I don’t love having my picture taken, I don’t get all weird about it. Back then, John would practically have to beg me, “Let me take a picture of you with the kids.” I would reluctantly agree, knowing that I would hate it. And when I picked it up from the photo shop, of course I did hate it, and often times threw the picture away.

I didn’t really want to see how big I had become. I wasn’t living in fantasy land. I knew that I was wearing the biggest size Lane Bryant sold. I understood that finding undergarments was really difficult. I acknowledged my wedding rings no longer fit. Intellectually, I knew all of those things, but I tried to avoid thinking seriously about any of it. Because if I ever allowed myself to dwell on how I looked I knew I would get depressed! And if I got depressed I would eat more and more.

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There are a few times where I vividly remember having to face the reality of my size while looking in the mirror. One time is when I was getting my hair cut. I sat down in the chair and the hair stylist shook out the cape and put it around my big self. It floated up like a parachute, and settled over my bulk. I remember looking in the mirror at the expanse of the black cape and thinking, “Wow, I’m huge.” I didn’t even want to get my hair cut anymore. I wanted to get up and go home. The entire time she was chatting and cutting my hair, all I could think about was how tiny my head looked on top of that big cape. When she finally finished and I had paid her, I went to the car and cried. How had I gotten to this point that even getting my hair cut felt embarrassing?

Facing the reality of not only my size, but my unhealthy lifestyle was hard. My final moment of truth was on the doctor’s scale. Up until that moment all I did was get upset about how I looked and felt. On that day I finally looked in the mirror and said, “I’m not going to live like this anymore.”

Question: Did you find it hard to accept your size and how you felt physically before you started on the path to healthy living?  Diane

As I gained weight and gained weight, I tried so many different diet plans it was almost laughable. And for every diet I quit, I had an excuse as to why that particular diet didn’t work for me. Here’s my top 10 excuses I used to quit a diet.

1. I didn’t like it
2. It was too hard
3. I didn’t want to count things
4. I was too fat to do the exercise
5. I don’t like certain foods on the program
6. Too expensive
7. Probably it was just a scam
8. Too time consuming
9. I didn’t want to be weighed by a stranger
10. Felt guilty about every piece of food I put in my mouth

Looking at that list now, twelve years into maintenance, I can laugh at myself. Who was I kidding? The problem wasn’t the particular plan I was trying – the problem was me. Every excuse in the world wouldn’t make up for my lack of commitment, follow through, and readiness. With every diet I tried and failed, my excuse list grew. I’d vainly try and explain to John and my friends why I had once again stopped going to Weight Watchers, quit cutting back on fattening foods, or stopped counting calories. Sometimes the more I explained the worse the excuses sounded. Finally, I stopped explaining and started eating chocolate. I reasoned that John would assume I had quit my newest diet when he saw me eating chocolate chips for breakfast, so there really wasn’t any reason to explain. And my friends? Well, hopefully they wouldn’t ask.

What reasons have you given for failing to follow through on a diet that you’ve started? Are there any valid reasons to quit before you’ve reached your goal weight?  Of course there are, and I’ll share my thoughts on that another day, but for now, let’s think about why we quit dieting.

When I looked back at the quick “Top 10″ list I wrote, I realized there was a common denominator. The common denominator was me. I was my own best excuse for stopping a diet plan. “I” didn’t like the way things were going, so “I” quit. It all came back to me, and all the excuses in the world couldn’t hide that.

It’s still hard for me to look at that list of excuses because I realize, even today, that I have to take full responsibility for my weight gain. That’s still hard for me to do. But moving past the sadness, and accepting the responsibility was important for me. Once I did that, I really started to sense a change in myself. Only I could remove the excuses I had used in the past for quitting a plan. Only I could get out my own way.

This wasn’t easy to do, because by throwing those excuses out the window what was I left with? Myself. Just me and my mirror. Looking back at my own reflection was not only the person who made up false excuses, but also the person who could put those excuses behind her and succeed.

As you go about your day today, I’d encourage you to think about what excuses you have used to either quit your plan, or veer significantly from your plan. Look in the mirror and convince yourself that the best reason to STAY on your path is looking right back at you.  Diane

But step by step, I’m going forward. And the reason I wanted to write this post, was to get your opinions and thoughts on exercise. Not if you think it’s a good thing, because probably most of us are in agreement on that fact. My question is: Can people sustain the level of exercise they are doing to lose weight?

Here’s an example: I read at least 10 blogs recently, where the men and women were super motivated to lose weight. Good for them!!!! But, in reading through their blogs, I was astonished at how much exercise they were doing. I’m not talking about just taking a long walk every day, or spending an hour in the gym a few days a week. I’m talking hard-core, training for the Olympics type of exercise. Doing two workouts a day, two hours at the gym, and then walking for an hour later. Riding bikes for hours at a time, then working at the gym. And these aren’t people who are training for a triathlon or anything. They are just working their behinds off to lose weight.

I admire that in a lot of ways. But it scares me for them. Unless you are training for a specific event, then can you really sustain that type of intense exercise forever? Or do you need to? Here’s my thoughts, and I’d love to hear yours. Exercising that much burns a lot of calories, and most of the people I saw, were losing weight, but not rapidly. Which makes me think they are eating to compensate for the calories burned. Understandable, and good in some ways. But are they eating so much, that when they reach their goal weight, and cut back on that crazy amount of exercise, will their eating habits be able to maintain their weight, or will they start to regain?

Do you see what I’m saying? Exercise is great, but the point of weight loss for me wasn’t just about losing weight, but changing my lifestyle from an unhealthy, sedentary life, to an active life that was both realistic and sustainable. So for me, that included exercise six days a week, but generally for 45 minutes at the most. I strength train a couple times a week, and am working to increase that a little bit.

How much exercise is too much? Or is there such a thing?  For athletes this answer will be different. But for your average person, how much can you keep up? Sure, you may be able to spend hours and hours a week at the gym while you are super focused on your weight, but can you do that much exercise to maintain your weight loss? Or do you want to?

This may vary by person. But I wonder, if that person wasn’t an athlete to begin with, do they really want to spend that much time just to maintain a loss?

I’m not sure about this one. I just know, that when I read these people’s stories, and see the amount of time they are spending exercising, I worry for them. I worry about sustainability. What do you think? What are your goals once you get to where you want to be? Or if you are already there – what does your exercise routine look like?  Diane

I wanted to thank Tammy and Hadley for the Lovely Blog Awards. I will pass them on tomorrow when I have a chance to spread around the link love! I feel very honored, and very appreciative.